METAL GEAR SAM : PHANTOM CALLER

Sam Mackeddie sure loves his Metal Gear. He also loves making films weird as possible to the point they are incomprehensible and don’t make any sense. His ideas can be so impenetrable that I felt like I had to sit down while reading the script. The original thing he had was basically me getting carried around a hospital on a stretcher, before being held down and given eyedrops, and then finding all my friends tied up by nooses in the attic. Thankfully I was able to convince him to let me do a sexy dance instead. This is because of his fondness for ‘Room 836’, a black and white film we made about a year ago. Rewatching it, there’s some pretty good moments, but I feel that I prefer to make comedic stuff rather than an actual gritty horror. Not that there’s anything wrong with making films where i die all the time.

The origin of this is definitely from the Prankdial application’s ‘Stop using my Wifi’ call. The first time someone tried to do it to me, I thought it was a friend of mine because of the weirdly bland scottish accent on the line. Sam called me up a half hour later, accusing me of pranking him “I fucking know it was you Carson” whereas I don’t know who did it to either of us. It’s a lot less damaging I suppose than the time they called 3 taxis and 4 fish suppers to my house. I’m still barred from riding with Capital Cars.

The Metal Gear Solid element of this one really doesn’t make much sense other than we wanted to make the opening like ‘Venom’ Snake sitting in the MGSV helicopter. I added the stinger with the call after realising that it’s the other iconic thing in MGS I really like, those phone calls after the credits where they drop bridges of information on you. Oh Kojima, you crazy bastard. Hope to make more post-credit scenes like that. I feel I got the timing just right with all their weird pauses between lines.

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YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO マクロスMACROSS 82-99

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マクロスMACROSS 82-99 is a Vaporwave, Future-Funk artist with tunes that take you to a car driving down imaginary highways into oblivious bliss. There is euphoria in every corner of this funky, sexy music which draws influence from Japanese disco with beautiful engrish, neon covered cities and powerful synths. The pure joy that can come from listening toマクロスMACROSS 82-99 is rivalled only by their other comrades in the future-funk scene, like Yung Bae and Skylar Spence. The latest effort CHAM! is fantastic and is worth a listen from front to back, and is available from Bandcamp to download, but you can catch it here, streamed from good old soundcloud. Put down your full size body pillows and listen in, you lovely people. Your english is good.

 

https://soundcloud.com/macross-82-99/sets/cham-out-now-macross82-99

THE BEST YOUTUBE VIDEO IN THE UNIVERSE – KITTENS VS COMBAT CREATURES

Have you ever wanted to introduce a six-legged robot crab that shoots foam pucks into a litter of cats and warp the ecosystem? Well now you don’t have to, now that Youtuber StudioSinga has brought a robot overlord to his kitty cats. They seem so unaware of the drastic change to their lives this new king will bring, living in their cardboard houses and sliding around the floors with their barely able kitten bodies. Once, in an apartment where the big cat ruled, came a new boss, shooting foam and judging kitty cats with it’s Panasonic camera. Rejoice my kitties, accept your new robot overlords.